When A Colleague Dies

We spend roughly a third of our lives at work. We celebrate milestones together, endure the hard days together, and somewhere along the way, the people we work with become part of the fabric of our lives. So when a colleague dies, the grief that follows is real, it's significant, and it deserves to be treated that way.

And yet, workplaces are often the last place grief is given any real space.

Many organizations, often without realizing it, reinforce the myths of grief. Be strong. Stay professional. Keep busy and you'll be fine. Grieve on your own time. These messages are well-intentioned, but they leave employees feeling like they have to choose between being human and being a good employee. That's a choice no one should have to make.

What happens when grief goes unaddressed

Unresolved grief doesn't disappear just because someone is at their desk. It shows up in other ways: irritability, low morale, lack of focus, reduced productivity, higher turnover, and employees who are physically present but emotionally checked out.

A study by the American Psychiatric Association found that 93% of employees who felt valued and supported at work said they felt motivated to do their best work, and 88% reported feeling engaged. In times of grief, that sense of support matters more than ever. How an organization responds in these moments stays with employees for years. It shapes trust, loyalty, and culture in ways that are hard to undo.

There's no official handbook for navigating grief at work, but there are some meaningful things organizations can do.

How to support your team through the loss of a colleague

Communicate openly.

Don't let loss become the elephant in the room. Talk about your colleague. Share stories. Keep the team informed about any plans to remember them. When leaders take the lead on acknowledging grief openly, it gives everyone else permission to do the same. You don't need to have the perfect words. Being warm, honest, and present is enough.

Offer flexibility.

Especially for those who worked closely with the person who died or who had a close friendship with them. Grief affects focus, energy, and concentration. Ask employees what support looks like for them, and where possible, adjust workloads or timelines for a period of time. A little breathing room goes a long way.

Respect that grief looks different for everyone.

Each person had a unique relationship with the colleague who died, and will process the loss in their own way. There is no right way to grieve and no timeline. Some will find comfort in staying busy. Others will find that very difficult. Both are valid.

Be mindful of anniversaries and milestones too. Grief has a way of resurfacing around those dates, sometimes when people least expect it.

If your team is diverse, be open to the fact that different cultures have different traditions, expectations, and ways of honouring the dead. Honest conversations and genuine curiosity go a long way.

Find a way to grieve together.

Funeral and memorial practices from around the world share one thing in common: community. We are meant to grieve together. Finding a way to honour your colleague as a group, however small, can be deeply meaningful.

Some ideas:

Donate to a charity in their name
Plant a tree on company grounds to keep their memory alive
Pool together to help the family with funeral costs, or contribute to the education of any children they left behind
Organize a meal train or gift cards for the family so they don't have to think about cooking

Even small gestures remind a family that their person mattered, and they remind your team that this organization knows how to show up.

Check in regularly.

Grief doesn't wrap up after the funeral. Managers and team leaders should check in with employees in the weeks and months that follow. Ask what they need. Look out for signs of depression, fatigue, or prolonged withdrawal. Grief can quietly become something heavier if it goes unsupported.

Offer resources.

Grief can feel isolating, especially when it seems like everyone around you has moved on and you're still carrying it. Having a list of trusted resources ready to share can make a real difference.

One organization I genuinely trust and refer people to is AWC Grief Support, a Canadian grief support organization staffed by lovely, skilled humans who offer therapy and resources for people navigating loss.

You may also want to consider bringing in a grief specialist to speak to your team or coach your leaders on how to recognize, talk about, and support employees through loss. You don't have to wait for a death to happen. Leaders who have these tools before they need them are far better equipped to show up when it matters most.

This is an opportunity

Employees will remember for a long time how well, or how poorly, their organization handled one of the hardest moments of their working lives. This is a chance to show your team that they are seen, that their grief is not an inconvenience, and that the culture you are building is one where the whole human being is welcome at work.

If you'd like support designing a grief training or presentation for your organization, I'd love to talk.